Category Archives: Random

Lies, more lies & parceline

Parceline have got to be the worst courier company I have ever had the misfortune to had dealings with. What follows is the venting of my spleen, having shitted away a day waiting for them:


I had a parcel due to be delivered today (xxxxxxxx) and there have been two of us in all day waiting for it, and taking time off work.

At around 3, I phoned your call centre and was told that the package was definitely out for delivery and that it could arrive any time before 5.

At 5.15 I phoned again – the helpful person tried to contact the driver but without success. The driver’s depot told the CS agent that the driver was still out on his rounds and hadn’t returned.

At 6, I phoned up your call centre again in an effort to find out what was going on – I was promised a call back "shortly" with the answer. I still haven’t had the call…

I tried to phone you at 6.45, but of course, you were closed…

At 7 your online tracking updated to show that you were "Unable to deliver, calling card left" at 3.14 today. This is not true – no-one tried to deliver and no calling card was left.

What am I to do now? Do I take another day off on the off-chance you try to deliver tomorrow?

I expect an email or phone call to tell me that it will arrive before 9am tomorrow. 

Crazy search strings

A few of the more unusual search strings that have brought people here:

  • "Pierced dick"
  • "bum fluff"
  • "brewer twins gallery"

The last one features quite highly in Google it seems, hurrah for the lawyers!

Democracy in action

Was walking back from the shops along Warwick Road this morning and was greeted by the sight of lots of motorcycle based policemen blocking the road off. Various things went through my mind:
– Terrorism? (stupid)
– Event at the exhibition centre? (perhaps)
– Other? (likely)
In actual fact it was a demonstration against the “Congestion Charge” being expanded into Kensington & Chelsea. I know a lot of people have stupid stickers in their car and house windows protesting against it, so I was expecting a huge mass of people. Not so! There was, in fact, maybe a hundred people (25% were in pushchairs) and a greater number of police officers.
I judge the effect of this demonstration to be virtually nil – except in really annoying and inconveniencing the residents and motorists of the area, the very people who these people are supposedly demonstrating for!
Awful, poor quality camera phone pic here.

Vacuous, tired, psychopaths

So, the latest incantation of this dreary format has started again. Last year I didn’t watch “Big Brother”, but instead spent the odd free evening watching otters and badgers with Bill Oddie on the BBC. Yes, BB4 was universally hated.
I have had every intention of not bothering watching again this year, however an accidental exposure (well, there was nothing else to watch) to the opening night has got me hooked I fear.
How have they managed to do this? The key ingredients that the viewing public wishes to see are essentially sex and masses of bitching and backstabbing. To this end they have filled the place with a bunch of nuts, fruit loops and psychopaths; thrown in several gay men (renowned to be promiscuous), a militant lesbian (I dislike her intensely already), a bisexual porn obsessed lady from the north and a post-op transsexual; then added in a religious fanatic.
Excellent – a recipe for sniping all around: BB5 shall have my limited viewing attention. Fuck – another summer wasted.